Et cetera, &c.

Quotations and photos and reblogs of cool stuff other people did.

“My ego only needs a good rhythm section.”

– Miles Davis

My Schedule During The Purge

hothotphone:

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In America for one day each year, all crime, including murder, is legal. This is the Purge. This is my schedule during the Purge.

12 AM – 1 AM: The Purge begins. Immediately boot up your laptop and start furiously torrenting episodes of The Wire.

1 AM – 3 AM: Ignore the pleas for help coming outside your door because you’re too busy playing a video game you just pirated.

3 AM – 12 PM: Fall asleep after ripping the stupid “Do Not Remove” tag off the mattress.

12 PM – 1 PM: Wake up. Don’t brush teeth or shower. Eat double-stuffed Oreos dunked in Nutella for breakfast.

1 PM – 2 PM: Drink wine straight out of the bottle as you break into your ex’s Facebook account using the password she really should never have told you.

2 PM – 3 PM: Your ex keeps messaging someone named Kriss, but it’s impossible to tell if Kriss is a girl or a boy. Kriss’s Facebook profile picture is a mountain range. Fucking Kriss.

3 PM – 4 PM: Drunk dial your ex and leave 300 voicemails in defiance of your restraining order.

4 PM – 5 PM: More Nutella Oreos.

5 PM – 6 PM: Watch all the beautiful explosions going on outside your window. Snag a couple pics for your Instagram with the hashtag #thepurge.

6 PM – 7 PM: Cautiously head outside. You have brought a skateboard over to a “No Loitering or Skateboarding” sign. Unfortunately, you never learned how to skateboard so you just stand on the board for a couple minutes before returning home.

7 PM – 11 PM: Drive over to the movie theater. Buy a single ticket but stick around for multiple movies. You smuggle Nutella and Oreos into the theater inside your coat pockets. Fuck you, AMC.

11 PM – 12 AM: Go home and attempt to watch the pilot of The Wire but fall asleep three minutes in.

My Schedule After The Purge: Basically the same.

[“Ben Baker is a writer living in Arlington, Virginia. Like everyone else, he is on Twitter.]

George S. Green Memorial - Culp’s Hill, Gettysburg National Military Park

George S. Green Memorial - Culp’s Hill, Gettysburg National Military Park